Interesting word, epiphany, and an interesting feeling.
It is almost like deja vu in the way it comes on.
One minute you are just cruising through your day, same as it ever was, and then something happens. A tiny trigger, a small thing that turns out to be the last piece in a puzzle you may not have even realised you were working on. You can almost hear the “click” as the puzzle resolves itself into a new level of understanding.
It does not happen to me often. When it does it is always an odd feeling, but a good one.
I had one of those moments yesterday when I was reading Bre’s post about going back to the gym.
Four years ago I was clocking in at nearly 300lbs. Actually as far as I ever measured my highest was 272, but in my mind that’s beyond close enough. Then I actually started to give a crap.
I watched what I ate.
I went to the gym (and actually worked out there).
I tracked everything I did and everything I ate. (I used the Weight Watchers points system, it worked for me)
I lost a grand total of 98lbs, getting down to 175 at my smallest. I had not seen that since 7th grade. Not even the day I graduated boot camp.
Then I had a series of things happen in my life that caused me to lose focus on what matters, my own health. I spend a lot of my energy helping others, I need to help myself. With that in mind I dug out my books and my gym clothes. I have to get back to it, I have no real choice.
I started today.
As a wise wrinkled green Muppet with big eyes once said: Do or do not… there is no try.
So here’s the deal Internet, I am going to come here once a week and spill my guts. Well, not literally, that would make a mess on the keyboard. You know what I mean. My weeks start on Saturday and end on Friday, sometime on the weekend I will post how I did for the week.
I am hoping that by putting myself out there like I plan to I can encourage myself to keep at it when all I want to do is say “Fuck it, I am going to Little Caesars and eating pizza till I barf.”
So here is the first installment of “what the hell did I do to myself, and why am I telling the interwebs?” My baseline to start is the 243lbs I have let myself get back up to. I don’t like it, but it’s the truth. Every journey has a starting point, that’s mine.
My goals for the week are as follows:
- I will get to the gym at least three times, in the event I am required to be home and can’t make the gym my backup plan is a minimum of 30 minutes of cardio (probably step) using the Wii fit.
- I will also follow the points system I learned in weight watchers. I still have my books, and I know how to use them.
- I will post how many times I made it to the gym, my total points consumed (and what was left over, if anything), and my current weight. I will do this during the weekend with the weight for the week coming on Saturday morning before breakfast.
- I will not fail.